"Friendship?! Is that you?!"

Yesterday was the best start to Friendsday in a long time. I spent the night at Darcy's and woke up to her phone ringing. She rolled over to look at her phone, paused and looked at me, gasped, and answered an unknown number with "FRIENDSHIP???" Sure enough Kait squealed "Yes!" from the other line, all the way from Amsterdam. We got to chat and catch up for a full hour. Since she left Oregon 18 days ago she has broken into the Zoo, had tea with an old Irish couple, learned how to say "pound it" in Dutch and even celebrated Friendsday in Europe. For those of you who don't know this beautiful soul, check out her blog here! She's currently going around the entire world seeing what it's all about.

Most of us had obligations during the day this Friendsday so we made it into a Friendsday evening. This included the making of monster cookies. They were a large memory from my college years, coors light and monster cookies was your typical weekday in the dorms. Monster cookies include but are not limited to: peanut butter, M&M's, a lot of sugar, oatmeal and gluten free joy! Recipe from Paula of course: yummy colorful gluten free cookies.

We also crafted the night away in honor of our fathers. Fathers Day is on Sunday if you didn't remember, so make your dad a card and tell him how awesome he is for being responsible for 1/2 of your existence. 

paper trail

"Another new environment, another goodbye, another uncertainty, another.. New beginning". 9/27/2006:  marks the date of the christening of these blank pages in my journal, which also happened to be the day I start college at PSU. 4 years, 8 months and 12 days ago was my first week at PSU, 4 years, 8 months and 12 days later I'm graduated. I've been approaching the end pages of my journal. 26 pages left.  I'm tempted to leave this journal as is. My "in college journal". I read through it today.. I thought I'd share the experience..

The past 4 years, 8 months and 26 days have been perfect. Every regret, mistake, success, gain and loss. It was all perfect. All what has brought me here today.

Graduate college: Check

This morning I woke up at my body clock time: 7am. The time that my body has instilled after 9 months of 20 credits of tedious social science classes, biology classes that alone make me want to cry, 20 hours a week of owning up to the job title as "nanny" and trying to squeeze the logistics of being an adult with in it all. But this morning I woke up and.. and.. I rolled over and said no. No we don't have to do this anymore well trained body, there are no tests to get up and study for, no papers we need to finish.. we are done. It feels so good, to finally be done. It only took 6 years to graduate but I'm reassured with that decision having visited 9 countries, experiences under my belt that school would not have presented me otherwise and descent grades to leave PSU with.

This morning I can finally allow creativity back into my heart and soul. I can dust off the journal, my photos, sewing machine and books and finally reacquaint myself with the opposite side of my brain. Where I'm living this summer is a little ironic and a tad symbolic. I lived at SW Columbia with my friend and room mate Lyndsey for my Junior and (what should of been) my Senior year's of college. Through ASPSU (PSU student government) I met her then and current boyfriend Ethan who I shared the adventures of decision making and advocacy via college and a youthful eager heart. I moved in with Lyndsey on a acquaintance basis and two years later I had an amazing friend. Lyndsey and Ethan now live together at SW Columbia and my room has acted as guest room. For this summer I was looking for somewhere dirt cheap to live in order to take off into the world in the Fall. With out even blinking Lyndsey offered my old room to me for a rent price I couldn't pass on. I was honestly a bit apprehensive only because I have had a lot of emotionally deep experiences linked to this apartment and this room. I dated my boyfriend of 3 years almost the whole time I lived there and a lot of memories of my early years of college linked to this place I once laid my head. You know what I mean? I was afraid I would wake up and find myself living in the past, haunted with nostalgia. However I accepted Lyndsey's generous offer and here I am living in my old room I occupied 2007-2009. Yesterday I woke up at 5am and walked to school to study before my last final. That walk I had done hundred's of times. The sun was rising, no one was out, the smell of summer in the air and I definitely teared up for a moment. A walk that I had done so many times and to now walking it for the last time. I thought of the person I was when I had done this walk the first time, the things I would have been thinking about, doing later that day and settled in that moment of growth. Oh rites of passage.
Besides that moment, no sense of heart tugging nostalgia has snaked into my heart, no regrets, no overflow of memories, just peace in relation to SW Columbia. I look back, smile, feel grateful of the life I have lived and turn forward even more excited to move on. *sighh. Queen of nostalgia is absent of..well.. nostalgia in a place that I thought would inevitable overwhelm me with such. Ah freebird..

Heres some photos of my new digs..

and this photo was taken when Lyns and I lived together.. in this same apartment back in 2008. I'd say things haven't change in the sense of our friendship..

when all is said and done

Ahhh that feeling..
that feeling of accomplishment and fatigue that follows it.
Accomplishment in the fact I finished my paper 6 minutes before it was due.
Accomplishment in the fact I had been drinking for 28 hours previously.
Accomplishment in the fact I have so many beautiful people in my life.
Accomplishment in the fact that I am 24 and living the life I always dreamed of.
Accomplishment in the fact I realize I have been living the life I had always dreamed of.
I am seriously bursting with joy and feel no sense of guilt in expressing the amount of happiness I have. I mean.. any person who feels happiness should be on top of a mountain (or blog) shouting thanks to the universe. As everyone does, contemplating what makes you happy is what everyone does on a conscious or subconscious level.
There are many things in this incredible world that brings me joy.
-A powder day and the surreal silence that is unique to snow.
-A long day at school and work, to come home, grab my climbing shoes, walk in to The Circuit, dub step blasting, high five my fellow climbers and "flash" a route.
-Solo travel and that initial 10+ hour flight that offers serious time of reflection and anticipation of the unknown.
-Horses. The connection to a gentle but powerful animal while venturing into beautiful Oregon forest.
-Dancing my freaking face off
-Phone off. Music on. Secluded spot. Book.
-Dawn. Running shoes and an empty trail. The release that pounding some earth gives my soul.

But when it all comes down to it.. it's the people in your life. 

The relationships you succeed with various character and personalities.

 Its.. love.