at least one

We all do this. We get what we want. The job, the friends, the house, the boyfriend, the family or even the "perfect" red jacket.

Then we question it.

Is this really what I want?

Over and over. We’re never satisfied.

Cursed humans. [And I say cursed as cur-said not cur-sed. Because it just gives it the meaning I’m really trying to give it. Webster excepts both pronunciations]

Anyway..

Currently I’m satisfied with at least one. Even if it’s satisfaction amongst the smiles and the angry eyes. And I’m not sure how that can be, but I’m going to do my best not to question it.

midnight

12am seems like the perfect time to start writing.

So, today is now officially July 16^th, a brand new day. Odd, how minutes ago it was the end of something and just like that it’s now something new. I wasn’t really prepared to appreciate this, newness. The thought kind of stresses me out. Did I appreciate July 15^th 2012 enough? Because I’ll never see that day again, but I suppose it’s just a day, in a year.

What if the date changed in the middle of everyday instead? 12pm instead of 12am? I would think it would be mostly confusing. Mostly for scheduling purposes, which is personally important to me. I like that we go to bed and wake up to a new day, not just new because we woke up, but because there’s a real number to it. A date. Set by math. The international language of no dispute.

However, as I sit here grateful that humans are diurnal, I find myself having a date with my laptop in the middle of the night. I must admit, the night is beautifully mysterious. So here I am flirting with it.

And.. I do believe that’s the extent of which I share this intimacy. Goodnight.

one in seven billion

Sometimes I feel like no one in the entire world gets me.
 Not a single one.

Not like I expect them to..
 or I to them.

But Thank God I have at least one..

Thanks for getting me RM.

slow down

Today mark's a designated amount of time since something designated happen.
We all have them.
But that's not the point. The point is, is that these mid-twenties have me suddenly really seeing my old habits for..

..what they really are were(?). 

Physiological this, attachment theory that. It's overwhelming sometimes, not living in my once ignorance is bliss state. I feel.... as though a blur behind the forward moving force. Trying to catch up.

Wait for me. Slow down..