things

I've been neglecting blogging. To anyone that may read, I apologize.
I've been waiting until I re-vamp this thing until I truly commit to it again, but I've been way busy with other stuff. Like real life stuff. Stuff I've been neglecting longer than my little blog. Stuff like my future, my career and the people that matter.
I'm a person of my direct surroundings, I have the ability and misgiving of adapting really well. Yet, the thing deep inside me that screams with passion for new, for real, for passion, never lets me stay for too long. So within the past two months, I've done some much needed rearranging.

I moved out of SE Oak St and into a cute little purple house

 one block away from one of my closest friends.

I became a CNA2 and fell in love with nursing all over again.

I started running again.

Taylor bought a house! 

Which means I basically have an additional new home.

I applied to University of Rochester's Accelerated Bachelors of Nursing program,

 wish me luck!

Things a good. Things are calm. Things are back in order. I continue to learn a lot about myself, friendship, relationships and the future. And although a lot of people and situations have let me down this year, things are good. Things are making more sense, and thank God for the places and people that I find are real, and so very alive.

early bird

I want more early morning people. Early morning people for the sunrises
and the first cup of coffee.
Morning chill, first light discovery. For firsts.

 Less late night people.

 I want less whiskey gingers and unconscious mid-mornings. 

Everything seems to be in the dark, including integrity. 

I want to be part of first impressions in the early morning. Something that doesn't just wake me up in  physical way, but in another way I can't explain. Give me something new.

aftermath of partying

..revelation.

19 lessons by Neil Fitzgerald

Meet Neil. 

He's one of the most incredible people I know. He's currently living in Australia, where I'm positive he's just handing out blissful smiles or wonderment to everyone that meets him. He kinda has the affect. Neil wrote these and I thought I'd share..

19 important lessons learned thus far

1. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

2. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

3. Nobody cares if you can't dance well, just get up and dance.

4. If you find yourself on a bathroom-less European train with food poisoning and you're wearing a beanie, swallow your pride and get resourceful.

5. Sexual orientation is a myth

6. Never lick a steak knife.

7. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

8. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

9. Family is everything

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can actually see a baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. The Gods of all major religions are blackmailers.

12. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

13. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

14. Everyone's a prostitute.

15. No, you can't paint like Jackson Pollock. 

16. Feminists f*** better.

17. Santa gives more to rich kids than poor kids.

18. Life doesn't care about your goals

19. Your friends love you anyway.

at least one

We all do this. We get what we want. The job, the friends, the house, the boyfriend, the family or even the "perfect" red jacket.

Then we question it.

Is this really what I want?

Over and over. We’re never satisfied.

Cursed humans. [And I say cursed as cur-said not cur-sed. Because it just gives it the meaning I’m really trying to give it. Webster excepts both pronunciations]

Anyway..

Currently I’m satisfied with at least one. Even if it’s satisfaction amongst the smiles and the angry eyes. And I’m not sure how that can be, but I’m going to do my best not to question it.

midnight

12am seems like the perfect time to start writing.

So, today is now officially July 16^th, a brand new day. Odd, how minutes ago it was the end of something and just like that it’s now something new. I wasn’t really prepared to appreciate this, newness. The thought kind of stresses me out. Did I appreciate July 15^th 2012 enough? Because I’ll never see that day again, but I suppose it’s just a day, in a year.

What if the date changed in the middle of everyday instead? 12pm instead of 12am? I would think it would be mostly confusing. Mostly for scheduling purposes, which is personally important to me. I like that we go to bed and wake up to a new day, not just new because we woke up, but because there’s a real number to it. A date. Set by math. The international language of no dispute.

However, as I sit here grateful that humans are diurnal, I find myself having a date with my laptop in the middle of the night. I must admit, the night is beautifully mysterious. So here I am flirting with it.

And.. I do believe that’s the extent of which I share this intimacy. Goodnight.

one in seven billion

Sometimes I feel like no one in the entire world gets me.
 Not a single one.

Not like I expect them to..
 or I to them.

But Thank God I have at least one..

Thanks for getting me RM.

slow down

Today mark's a designated amount of time since something designated happen.
We all have them.
But that's not the point. The point is, is that these mid-twenties have me suddenly really seeing my old habits for..

..what they really are were(?). 

Physiological this, attachment theory that. It's overwhelming sometimes, not living in my once ignorance is bliss state. I feel.... as though a blur behind the forward moving force. Trying to catch up.

Wait for me. Slow down..

just. go.

Travel. Ahhh travel. 
You could say we have a relationship, we know each other, we get each other and we will forever continue this romantic dance. However just like any relationship I'm in no way any expert. But I think I've been fairly successful and I believe that  simplicity is key. Key for many things in life including travel, a beautiful thing that so many people love to make complicated. So after listening to envious words and excuses. Seeing Pinterest explode with countless amounts of dreamy travel quotes matched with an equally dreamy photo. And being aware of the more respectable those who seek out how they themselves can be a part of the wonderful travel experience.. I've decided to share the simplicity.
Here are the only four things you need to be on your way to the leaning tower of Pisa or the Sydney Opera House.. 
1. Balls. You need the balls to go alone, because if you wait around for your friends they're most likely not going to follow through. Which means you won't. 
2. A job and budgeting skills. Save EVERYTHING. That might mean no more morning coffee and canceling netflix, but so so worth it in the end
3. Disconnect. Disconnect from the nay-sayers including the nay-sayer part of your biggest critic- yourself. It's never going to a "right time" to travel in the sense of relationships, finances or career. But you have to decide what you value more, because the "right time" will never come.
4. A deadline. Buy your ticket no matter what 2-6 months out. It makes you less likely to back out and a timeline to help you save, prepare and get excited!

purple gatorade

How can someone be such an intertwined part of your life for months, years and then suddenly nothing? Not even your facebook friend.

This I will never fully understand.

When you enter this blissful romance of connection you never really stop and think that it's a possibility that it would ever be any different. That you'll always go for your weekly frozen yogurt, you'll forever be (insert nickname here) and this wonderful group of people will always be on your precious "favorites" on the beloved iphone. Then sometimes as fast as one day- nothing.

Life seriously rattles my brain how tragic it can be, almost in a way that's humorous with it's ironic tone. Almost as though it's an outside force, this thing named life sitting behind a desk with a bunch of buttons, recklessly pushing them for it's own selfish entertainment. Of course there's the "everything happens for a reason" and "it was meant to be" existing only for the coping heartbroken, as well as beer, friendship and chocolate. But then one day you walk into the grocery store and purple gatorade is on display with a giant sale sign above it and they cross your mind. What the fuck is so great about purple gatorade anyway? You have a moment.. smile or roll over eyes or both and that's it. Your mind returns back to "pasta sauce, apples and peanut butter".

There's a few where it took years to truly let go. There's a few the surprisingly took a lot less time. And there's those who will be forever on my heart, never fully understanding why. 

sometimes

sometimes you just need to cry
sometimes you just need to scream
sometimes you just need to go on adventure

and sometimes..
you just need to dance it out

*learn to know what sometimes you currently need

24

24 has been one of the best year ever.
I really think coming into your wiser years has a lot to do with it.

Here's a recap..

Birthday party May 30th 2011:
Starting off year 24 off right.. snowboarding.

Graduated college

Spent 6 amazing weeks with my soul mate- Rena Murray

Had one of the best jobs ever

Finally climbed outside

Accidentally hiked Mt. Hood

Went snowboarding.. in the summer

Experienced one of the best summers of my life

Witnessed my best friend get married

Went on my first solo trip to a non-westernized country: Central America

Hiked a volcano

   Swam in a volcano, twice

   Made the team (team zissou)

Had a surf with an entertaining Venezuelan pro surfer

Found a camp friend in a foreign country

Volunteered

Spent Halloween as a fox, on a tiny island off the coast of Honduras

Stayed the night on my very own island

  Watched baby turtles hatch

  Overcame my fear of the ocean

Meet the beautiful Lauri, travel partner extraordinaire 

Experienced Mezcal, worm and all

Went to a real life Lucha Libre show

Made last minute decisions

Moved into SE Oak St with three lovely friends

Cut down my own christmas tree

San Francisco to see Mr.David Lock

Flew myself to Vegas for a Valentines day surprise.

Following with an awesome non-traditional 

Valentines day of working a trade show.

Ran my first double digit

Became a Certified Nurse Assistant

Train: Vancouver > Portland

Completed a V5 at the circuit

=

Bought my first bike, how portland!

Sasquatch music festival! Bucket list check

Taylor ♥

"24 is the age people started taking me more seriously. 25 is the age when I started taking myself more seriously" -Jillian Barkely

Ok 25.. lets see what you got..

get outside

Adventures and escaping.
My kinda thing.
This past weekend Taylor and I headed into the forest with no set plan. Just in need of some seclusion, playtime and nature and we happen to stumble upon some prime secluded Oregon spots.
On Friday we rolled to Little Santiam River Trailhead in the early afternoon and hiked until we found the ideal camping spot. Flat ground, with our own personal river beach and a prepared fire pit. Quite perfect this river, offering swimming hole, after cliff jumping spot, after chill floating area. We set up camp, ran around in the forest (literally), ate dinner riverside and played "find the bird". Taylor being his perfectionist self said it was time for me to learn how to start a fire without paper and I succeeded!

*Camping rule number one: ALWAYS bring more than enough water and/or water purifier. We were forced to drink river water. Luckily we didn't get sick and it was the best tasting water I have ever had! But no seriously, always make sure your water purifier has batteries and is working. Say no to headaches and Giardia!

Day two:

We hiked the 3-4 miles back to the car. The day was already really hot so we knew we needed to find a pump for our newly purchased raft. In the small town of Stayton we found a pump, food and coffee and set out on a mission to find a lake or river that were up to our standards, which is kinda high. It has to be secluded, include a good camping spot (for free) and have some sort of view. We headed East following the river, passing crowded Detroit lake and trying back road after back road. We drove almost 11 miles down a gravel road toward something called Elk Lake but as we climbed elevation we were eventually stopped with a ton of snow. Bummer. We spent a majority of the day doing a few more trail and error's but were finally rewarded ten fold! Thanks to my favorite piece of technology, the old Iphone revealed a medley of lakes that resided at the base of Mt. Hoodoo (not to be confused with Mt.Hood).

Island Lake officially renamed Foxchip Lake

I know right?

 No people for the next 24 hours except the occasional local fisherman. Immediately after finding this spot Taylor and I both had one of our favorite quote's come to mind.. Not to mention this is one of Julian's Bialowas Photo's! Obviously.

So. We immediately pumped up the raft and floated on our own personal lake with our own personal island none the less. Rounding the other side of the lake we discovered hundred's (no exaggeration) of frogs just floating in the water, so the most logical thing to do with the afternoon was playing with the frogs.

Around dinner time we decided we should set up camp and catch a sunset float. Being that a forest fire had come through here within the past 5 years firewood was abundant and high quality. After we set up our tent appropriately with the door opening up to Three Fingered Jack, we grabbed beer and went off to watch the sun fall behind the Cascades.

Somehow Taylor and I partied with just each other, a case of beer and the incredible, seriously incredible stars until 2am. Hah. There was even some dancing involved thanks to Frank Sinatra. Serious perfection. 

#thisisoregon